In my secret life I am a mother
The baby that once was yet still remains
Needles pin my heart to clouds of hope
As I long to let go
of this dream that haunts me so
I wish to fully know
that I am whole.
Tantilizing whispers scorch my soul now
Baby showers, nursery rhymes, precious skin
Heaven kissed my life once with a shadow
Challenged me to embrace
Somehow without tiny face
Purpose burried in this place
and I am whole.
My tears have found solace in compassion
But grief demands to dig deep barbed roots
Divinely empowered against gripped weeds
I stand on solid ground
My Savior turns me around
I struggle but I’m found
so I am whole.
Ever in my heart I am a mother
Despite the blows of pain and fear and doubt
I fight to dwell in purchased peace and joy
He gently takes my hand
Seeks my faith in what He’s planned
Fills my courage cup to stand
for I am whole.